The world is indeed disgusting.

We have, in the past spoken about women's rights and her protection and blah, blah, blah. And we concluded (or have we?) that the women of today enjoy as much as freedom and liberty as men. Now, I ask who the f&%k thought of discriminating based on gender? Giving us our liberty is not a great deal. Bloody hell, we're born free and we will live free.

Having talked about the conclusion, its such a pity (some) men today continue to look at women and think of them as only sex symbols. I don't understand. We've kicked some guys ass and proved we can beat them at everything they do and/ or probably more. Isn't that enough?
I happened to read this article by Johann Hari on his website. Its a shame to manhood. Really, save yourself some dignity!
Johann Hari reports :
"Congratulations, Polanski-Defenders - Now the Child-Rapist Walks Unpunished!

Polanski admitted his crime before he ran away, and for years afterwards, he boasted from exile that every man wants to do what he did. He chuckled to one interviewer in 1979: "If I had killed somebody, it wouldn't have had so much appeal to the press, you see? But... fucking, you see, and the young girls. Judges want to fuck young girls. Juries want to fuck young girls. Everyone wants to fuck young girls!"

Read the full article

http://johannhari.com//2010/07/13/congratulations-polanski-defenders-now-the-child-rapist-walks-unpunished

Would he also do the same thing to his daughter? Or would he tolerate if someone did that to his daughter?

What a shame!

Call for Help!

Disclaimer: Now, let me tell you, although the world revolves around truth that is said in the most subtle way to be politically correct or sugar coated because it might hurt the other person, I've never gotten into such bad habits. I shall say things as it is.


Recently, I've heard a lot of instances of wife beating. It is apparently prevailing in an Urban society among the so-called educated youths. We've heard these stories to exist in remote places during early Independence days and maybe in some villages where government's rules and regulations were hard to employ. But it is sickening to know that girls even today go through this hell and still keep quiet to protect their marriage. They even keep this a secret and not letting their own parents know about the pain and hardship they undergo on a regular basis. I ask these girls, if your husband really loved you and cared about you, would he dare yell at you, let alone the thought of beating you up? If he really loved you, wouldn't he be sorry about his behaviour? If you're a strong woman (although there is a redundancy there!), wouldn't you stand up for your own rights? Your parents gave you a wonderful life and now you're going through this hell, for what, because you love him? So that your child can have a family?
I strongly urge the women of today to stand up against such assaults and protect themselves. A marriage is true only when you and your husband/ wife promise to keep each other happy, protect each other in difficult times.
India is a conservative land. Women are now fully aware about their rights and ways to protect themselves. Like how rape is a crime, wife beating is also a crime and thanks to women who keep their mouth shut and not letting the world know, most of these men go unpunished. Do you really think they deserve such a life? Do you really think you're willing to get bruises all over your body for the rest of your life to protect the so-called sanctity of your marriage?
It is so easy to crib about the system and our country. It is the responsibility of each one of us to stand up against something which disturbs us, bothers us.
Women, realize, the man you love(d) no longer cares about you, he punishes you only because you're conservative, secretive. Stand up and fight for what you deserve. Once a man becomes your husband, he doesn't get the right to hurt you, beat you or kill you. Nobody does. We're the masters of ourself. Remember to tell your parents about the difficulty you're facing. Maybe you're taught to keep things with yourself once your married but when you can't do something about it, its always better to seek help and who better than your own parents.

As a woman and a soon-to-be-wife, I urge you to live life your way. Living with a cruel man is in itself a bad thing to do, protecting such criminals and letting them get their way is even worse. Lets beat the system and stop men from ruling or ruining our life.
This calls for a change. A change for good.


Hail womanhood!

A very short note.

"......

Friend : How is it going there?

Me: Going good. Whats happening with you?

Friend: Nothing much. Usual stuff. Hey, you got engaged?

Me: Oh yes, last year.

Friend: Great. Congrats. Nice pictures.

Me: Thanks.

Friend: IS IT THE SAME GUY WITH WHOM YOU DID A PLAY (WITH)?

Me: Oh yes. *blush blush*

... "

.... And that is how my friends, people (in my world) know me and my fiance.

So in case you know me and didn't know I was engaged and engaged to the guy with whom I acted in a play. Here you are. This information should keep you good.

Pfff...

My first new year aboard.

Happy twenty ten to people who've made it to the URBAN DIARY.
May this year bring you love, luck and lentils.

The year that passed by has been momentous for me as I took/ made life changing decisions. I'm going to write more bout it later.
Yes, this is was my first new year aboard and my 4th consecutive year away from home. I mean, since college I've been partying only with friends leaving my young(er) brother and old grandmother with my parents.
I promise, mom and dad, I will make it with you all the next new year.
This new year was very special. The two people I love the most were a part of it. My beloved fianće and my best friend. I got to meet a few other friends of my friend who were really amiable and man! those boys can cook. Also, it was a pleasant change for me since I don't get to socialize much in the place I live.
So all of us went to the Stuttgart city center for the countdown. The city is huge! People were there everywhere. Most of them high on booze. There were some awesome fireworks as the clock struck 12 and people everywhere greeted each other, drank more and celebrated twenty ten. By far, one of the best new years I've had. Of course, each new year I've celebrated has been special in its own way. Coming from a (sort of) conservative family, I was never outside at 12am. But this time, I got to do in style. In Stuttgart, with my fianće, with my best friend.

2009 was a rather eventful year. Pleasantly eventful. I found a wonderful partner to spend the rest of my life with, I got admitted to a good university in Germany and what more, I got engaged to the man I loved with our parents blessings. I couldn't have asked for more. I may also mention about the play we did beginning of the year and was arguably(?) successful. I spoke so much kannada (my mother tongue!) and surprised myself, my family and my friends. That was one experience that will last a lifetime.
Also, I learnt swimming from the Olympic medalist, Nisha Millet. Something I was wanting to learn since a long time.

Twenty ten, as I mentioned earlier will indeed be year to watch out. I say this only because I've selected a tough course to clear and still wondering if I ever was a 'masters material'. I have things in my own hands. I make it or break it. I have to clear this masters with wedding bells next year (hopefully) and obviously, I can't stop dreaming about it.
Apart from this, I hope to do some travelling. I have a Schengen visa for crying out loud!
I will be fervently waiting for the end of this year to see where I land and what I do.

Cheers!

How to find a Bachelor, perfect for you.

No! let me tell you, I am not writing this to give ideas to people about "the hunt", some kind of 'Love Guru', those kinds you here on the Bengaluru radio stations these days, "Sorry is the magical word" , "Aww, he loves you", "Deepthi, please call back Pranav, he's sorry about what he did" Crap! [those were the names that came to a blank mind, so spare me if it's you]

This is about me. I've wanted to write this since a long time, but resisted coz I was scared, scared of being known. But now, I see things differently or should I admit, it's getting 'legal' and hence the guts. And what the hell, its my blog.

So, about 8 months back, I had a chance to act with a new theatre group. This was my first time on a big stage. I was nervous because I didn't know even my co-stars' names properly. The only connection was a familial one. Anyway, I met the boys with no expectation. They all seemed nice and were pretty serious about what they were doing.

We went through a series of rehearsals, almost everyday. I was just playing a cameo, but I was excited about the show, the rehearsals and the interesting conversations I got to hear during these rehearsals.

A few days passed by and I gradually saw myself attracted to this boy, who's first name was the only thing I knew. I kept hope and concentrated more on the show/ rehearsals as it was only a few days away.

Then, god decided to make me happy. On the day of the show, I got a ride to the place, where the show was staged by the same boy. It rained that morning and the nice fellow offered me his jacket. Like any other normal girl, I was swept off my feet. It was generous of him because he was wearing only a shirt, the one he would be wearing for the show. In spite of me saying no, he made me wear the jacket. I was happy to do so since I was already dreaming of things to come during the day and possibly the future. But I told myself, this was only the gentlemen in him that made him offer the jacket and he would have probably done this for any other girl or boy (?).

Then, we did a technical rehearsal, with lights, sounds etc and it seemed like it was all perfect. In this spare time, we did a 'making' for the show and it was fun and interesting to hear my love interest speak.

We did two shows back to back and it was a hit. People enjoyed it and praised the show, the lead actors, the punch lines and everything else.

We were all satisfied and it was the time to pack-up and go home. I was feeling nostalgic, I knew it won't be possible to meet the boy frequently or ever coz I wasn't even his friend.

God had other plans. There was a pub next to the place we performed and the boys wanted to have a booze and talk about the show. I was invited too along with my best friend who had come to see the show by the same boy I liked. I was obviously happy and thought of the possibilities of socialising with him and so accepted the invite.

The good thing about this place, the pub, was that you can't smoke inside the place. So most of the boys were taking turns to go out and smoke. My boy didn't smoke and enjoyed his beer quietly.

....And then, god made the impossible possible, the heavens fell. All of them including my friend went out for a smoke and only I and my boy were left in the table. Wow! I was ecstatic. To my surprise, the boy started talking about himself and asked about me. I was on cloud no. 9. I couldn't have asked for more, for a start. We spoke with almost no full stops. We went on and on about different things, our thoughts etc etc. Oh, it was a fun conversation and something I will remember for the rest of my life.

After about 10 minutes, our friends started to come back, though I was feeling bad coz of the intrusion, I was still happy we got this chance to know each other.

It was time to go home. And the best part, my boy was dropping me home which meant more time to talk and bond :) It was a lovely drive back home. We spoke more about each other. And finally we ended what was a very productive day, with a warm hug.

The next few days my boy was out of station. We kept in touch with each other, almost every minute. Frequent SMSes and calls kept my day filled with weird spirits of love and feeling of endless joy. I had thought to myself, this is the boy. But was unsure about his feelings for me. I must say, this is the best phase of a relationship where uncertainty takes the centre stage but still you sort of know things might turn green for you. I quite enjoyed it, still wishing it legitimized quickly.

After about 4-5 days, we went out for dinner. Yes, my first date. I was excited, nervous and didn't know how it would go. We went to a place in Jayanagar. It was lovely, the dim lights, the friendly waiters and the total ambience. We started to talk about the show we had done before we were again talking about each other. Selfish couple, eh?! We went home after a lovely dinner and entertaining and fun conversation. We messaged each other through the night, telling how good the date was and promised each other, we should do it more frequently. I thanked my stars that night and went to sleep.

Those half romantic (don't ask me the definition) messages and calls continued but the question still remained, does he love me? If yes, when is he gonna confess? What should I say? Accept immediately or take time to know him better?

That day arrived soon after a week when we decided to watch a movie together. We bought tickets for what was the worst performance by the actor, Paresh Rawal. The movie hall had barely 50 seats filled. We sat down with Popcorn and Pepsi. There was an exciting silence. He finally broke the silence by asking me to have more of popcorn. I think I took some.

And finally, he started about "the thing". I started growing nervous, so nervous that I spilt the drink all over me and he went out and got some tissues and water for me. Aww. I cleaned up the mess and looked straight at the boring movie we were watching. He started to talk again, this time sounding more determined. I'm obviously not going to reveal what all he spoke. He did say those three words and I was on cloud 9. I didn't say anything except for nodding or saying "Hmm, yeah" every now and then. The obvious shyness was prevailing.

That was a start, a great one.

In just a few months, he's become my everything. I see a best friend, a lover, a caring brother, a shoulder to cry on, my agony aunt, a mentor and just about everything I've always dreamt of.

Today, here we are getting engaged and planning our futures together. I hope god continues to bless us the way he has till now and our happiness doubles with each passing day.

Cheers!

Deutschland eintrag.... Part I

I'm here, finally!!

After having reluctantly decided on the course I wanted to study, I applied for a visa to Germany with much excitement. I even started learning German. I knew I had got a seat in a very prestigious university to study, its an irony people haven't heard too much about this place. Ilmenau.

After unexpected delays and holidays, I applied for my visa on the 24th of August. History was made. Ever since I had graduated, I wanted to do my Masters but never could shortlist on the country or the course. But now after 20 something years (what do you expect?! I'm not telling my age), I've come to realize about my much awaited (not only by me but my family too) Masters degree, that I was going to do at Technical University of Ilmenau or simply TU-Ilmenau. Cool,eh?

The VFS guys gave me an appointment for my interview with the consulate after a week. I had to go to Chennai for this. My whole family drove all the way from Bangalore to Chennai for my interview which lasted for about 15 mins but the wait was bout 4 hrs. Yes!! My appointment time was at 9:45am. Skipping breakfast, I and my dad reached the Consulate at 9:15am. I was told to show my face only 15 mins before the 'appointment' time. We waited outside sitting on the footpath and my dad was advising me to be calm. I was, actually. So at 9:40, I went near the security gate, the security guard there yelled "Appointment letter dikhao?". I showed it to him. He asked me to go in. I had mixed feelings as I entered. I had finally made it to my visa interview and I was content but at the same time I was anxious about my interview too. The clock struck 10 and nobody called my name. The other assistant guy who was inside who took our attendance (well, more or less), checking if we've made it or not, gave me a look. I smiled and went to him to ask when my interview was. He said "You have to wait, madam. Please sit there on the 4th chair in the first row'. I was upset but couldn't help. I went and sat there. After sometime, two other girls came and sat next to me. We exchanged smiles and started talking. I, then realized that many people who were waiting with me had the same appointment time!

At around 12:45pm, I was called and the consulate lady asked me questions, I more or less expected. I was told I'll get my visa, in case its approved only after 4 or 8 weeks. I came out of the place and joined my dad who had been patiently waiting without any food. So went to the hotel we stayed and joined the family and had a good lunch and left to Bangalore.

Days went by and I was still waiting for my visa. All through I did nothing but play Farmville, Cafe world and Fish tank on facebook. It used to make me happy.

In this long wait, a memorable event happened in my life. I got engaged to the love of my life. I was on top of the world. Like the popular cliché, everything around me made me happy. But this was until my fiance' left to UK for his studies. I was sad and happy. Sad because of the obvious separation and happy because he was doing something he liked. We all went to the airport to say good-bye. It was an overwhelming moment. We said our byes and returned home and since it was still early morning, I thought of continuing my sleep.

At around 11am, my mother woke me up with a letter in her hand. She told me it is for me and had some German consulate stamp on it. I woke up and kept my fingers crossed hoping it wasn't a rejection letter. I read the letter only to realize my visa was getting more complicated. It took me about 10 days to figure out the pros and cons and find a solution to it. I did without loosing temper or hope.

And finally, after two long months, I got my approval letter; just after deepavali. It made me extremely happy. I collected my approval letter and sent my passport for stamping on the same day. After this, I and my mom went on a marathon shopping spree and about woolen clothing in different colours and designs. Marathon packing sessions, re-packing and additions and deletions of things were on their way.

The day I was supposed to leave had finally arrived. 24th Oct, 2009. Wow! I had butterflies in my stomach as I woke up that morning. This was going to be my first trip aboard. I wasn't so excited about leaving home on that day. I cried and hugged my family members frequently telling them I'm gonna miss them a lot. But I chose this path and had to live-up to it.

So we all left to the airport at around 5:30. I had about 40kilos of luggage. My would-be mom-in-law and dad-in-law were coming to the airport. We all met at around 6:30pm and sat down near a bench and I was getting lot of advise and motivation from my people. I needed all of that. I finally went inside at around 7:15pm. Two hours before my flight. I was flying with Sri Lankan Airlines. I went to the counter and the man there asked for the usual documents, my passport, visa, air ticket etc. Much to my amusement, he asked for a college offer letter and an extension letter (since I was joining late to my university). I fired back saying why I needed to show him all these irrelevant docs. They made me wait for a while and in that time, two officers made friends with me. They assured it would be OK in a bit. I waited nervously. After about 15 mins, one of the officers, who was now my 'friend' asked for my passport and air ticket again. I gave it to him. After some lazy typing on his computer, he asked someone else for my boarding pass. He said to me, "I'm going to put you on BUSINESS CLASS from Bangalore to Colombo". I couldn't believe it. I said "Pardon me?" and he repeated the same thing. Wow! He did this because his ex-girlfriend's name was the same as mine! I thanked him and took my boarding pass. In this time, they weighed my luggage and it weighed 2.5 kilos more than I was allowed to take. They said it was OK and I needn't pay for it. Not a bad start, I thought to myself.

So I took my cabin bag, a heavy back-pack and a sling that had my books and reached the entrance door to the airport and spoke to my family again, describing this whole experience and a chance to travel Business class on my maiden trip aboard. My family members laughed and wished me luck.

I went to the security gates and there was a kannadiga who was doing all the checking. He asked me in kannada why I was going alone to Germany in all the places. I told him for my 'higher' studies. He said "Yakamma asht doora hogtaidya? Bere friends adru idara?". I was suddenly emotional and wanted to run back to my parents. But I resisted and told him, I did have a kannadiga friend there and everything will be good. Yes, I was telling that to myself as well.

After that, the usual security check was done and I went inside. I was seeing this airport for the first time. BIAL is not all that huge, but it is nicely done. I drank water and waited near gate 20. After about 5 mins, Sri Lankan Airlines announced boarding for all passengers of flight UL 172 flying from Bangalore to Colombo. Wth an adrenaline rush, I went inside. There was a cool 'skyline' walk that led to the plane. Before I could realized, I was inside the plane. The air-hostess welcomed saying "Aayu bhuvaan". I was finally here, I thought to myself. I got inside and looked for my seat "3D". It was a business class seat very close to the entrance. I kept my cabin luggage inside and sat down with the sigh of relief. Then, I called my parents who were on their way home and told them, proudly that I was sitting on a business class seat. They were happy and told me to eat well and relax. Then, I called my mom-in-law and told her bout the same. She, too asked me to relax and enjoy my flight and eat whatever food was available.

I switched off my phone as the captain announced the flight was clear for take off. In the mean time, a gentleman came and sat next to me.

Will continue the rest in my next blog.

I'll need to clean my room now and start studying.

My Coorg trip

This time I decided to holiday in the coffee land of Coorg. It was an extended weekend trip, 3 nights and 4 days.
It is about 6 hours from Bangalore to Coorg and if you're in a KSRTC bus and the driver is in the mood to waste no time, you'll get there in about 4 and a half hours like I did.
We had booked a homestay, "Silver Oaks Homestay" in the south part of Coorg and this homestay is the strong reason why I'm writing this blog. You'll find out why later on. Now, this majestic homestay was somewhere in between the forest amidst acres of coffee plantations and random flower gardens (there were a lot of those as well), about 40 kms from Gonikoppal. The lady, Sachi Ponnappa, the grand owner of the homestay had 'booked' a taxi for us from the bus station to her end of the world homestay. We reached Gonikoppal at around 9pm and the taxi driver was waiting for us. The excitement and the enthusiasm was high as this was my first trip to Coorg. The excitement slowly dwindled as the driver drove fast through the deserted forest roads. It was bloody scary. The man didn't know English/ Kannada or Hindi and I didn't know Tamil, that being the only language he spoke. It was a scary 1 hour drive and we finally got to our destination. The homestay. Silver Oak, yeah. Mrs Ponnappa appeared proudly as if she owned half of the world and greeted us. We greeted each other and she showed us our room. The room looked big, sort of. I thought to myself, it was good though it had no place to walk around as the furnitures were huge and wrongly placed. But I had surprise in store. Mrs Estate owner asked us to freshen up and get ready for dinner. Well, as I entered the room and looked around, I realised we couldn't lock the room door. The lock was sort of triangle shaped. There was more, as I entered the bathroom to have a quick wash, I realised Mrs Sachi Ponnapa was a romantic person, she seemed to have loved her days of dim lights and romantic dinners. The bathroom had a zero candle bulb! She claimed it is the best light for a bathroom. Sure! If you can manage to find the right place for the right deeds, else nothin more than a few layers of shit from the previous guest would stick onto you. Yikes! Nasty.

This grand room was priced at just Rs 1600, promising a good meals which included breakfast, lunch and dinner.

So after freshning up, we went to have dinner, she served large, cold white pieces of grated coconut and a few hard chapatis along with the surprisingly tasty beans preparation. That, being the only thing I could eat.

Well, then, we decided to sleep with unlocked doors. She promised to mind her own business and not interfere/ peep into our room.

Next day, a friend who was with me fell ill. I seriously think it was because of the ugly looking coconut something, apparently a great delicasy, had disease like stuff in it. She managed to be nice this time by constantly asking me what was wrong and I reassured her rather acted like it definately I wasn't blaming her culinary skills. Then, we decided to leave the place. We paid an extra 100 bucks and was about to leave when she and her nasty looking mother-in-law who constantly stared at us like she was some hungry cannibal spoke in some tribal language and the lady, Sachi told us "My bill is Rs 2000, I never wanted to give this room to you." Sure! We could not found a place with good food or just a place where we had decently lit/ safe rooms and bathrooms. The aggressive me was on the go almost immediately, the friend beside me was too reserved or shy to be loud enough to the big mouth in front of us. I must confess, I'm sort of good with such stuff. So I argued about her palace like room and the great ambience her Silver Oak had to offer! She was in the mood to continue this fight for another hour. I was thankfully in the mood to leave the place and actually enjoy my holiday. I asked her to shut up and we just left without any good-byes and the lady was still cribbing in her tribal language to god-knows-who on the phone.

The walk, out of the Silver Oak resort was rather a majestic one. We walked quietly, sometimes smiling at each other to the character we had met.

Confession 2 - I judge people with very small things. I had obviously judged the people of this part of the town.

...And the rest of my trip was amazing.

Must Dos-

->Try Bhel puri at the 4th stall when you visit the Raja seat in Madikeri.

->The best place to stay is a hotel, can't remember the name near Raja seat. Clean rooms, tasty food and well mannered staff.

-> The Tibetan monastery

Peace.